Out of Necessity

 

Image via Wikipedia

This is out of necessity.  It is not because I want to share any words of wisdom or even that I feel I have something to share that could help someone else.  This is just for my own sanity.  I have to get through the next 12 months while my youngest son puts himself in harms way.

I was a single mom raising three boys and spent 20+ years now trying to do my best to keep them out of harms way.  I tried time out, taking way privileges, whipping their butts, scolding them and laying on guilt trips.  Sometimes it worked.  The older they got it got harder.  Now it is impossible.

I am married now.  The boys step dad is awesome.  However, his perspective is different than mine and sometimes I am not sure he really understands so I write.

Shortly after graduating high school he left for Paris Island to train.  In spite of the fact we were at war I didn’t think he would actually get sent overseas because he was going into the Reserves.  I was naive.  I also was not aware what type of job he would have until he had already joined.  See my son is a Combat Engineer.  Combat Engineers blow things up.  Nothing civil about that.

They also re-build and construct.  But things must be blown up before any construction goes on and not much construction goes on in a war zone.

The first time he deployed his older brother was still an active Marine.  It was not a secure feeling knowing both of them were in the Middle East at one point.  But I got through it mostly because I was naive and did not know what was really going on half the time.

But this is his second tour.  He volunteered.  He did not have to go.  When I asked him why he told me that when he went the 1st time there were Marines that volunteered to go a second time and he is aware that had those Marines not gone with them and brought their experience then many more would have been killed.  He told me that there were some 19 year old men going over there this time for the first time just like him and if he does not bring his experience than they may be killed.  I understood.

I’m damn proud first to be a mom, second to be an American.

This blog is for me.  If you chose to read please leave encouraging comments I’m going to need them.  Some days more than others.  In between posts please pray for our men.